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REPORTER: A record heat wave
is melting Los Angeles,
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sparking chaos in stores
across the Southland.
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Riot police have been summoned
to several locations...
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Oh, damn.
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This heat is untenable.
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It's like a Jewfro apocalypse in here.
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I look like a '70s divorce attorney.
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NICK: So we don't have A/C.
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You guys are going to love this.
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I invented something even better.
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It's called the Ranch System.
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The Ranch System for Cooling.
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This is one of my best inventions.
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Reagan's going to freak
out when she sees it.
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Check it out. We've got
a combination of cool winds,
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a-a cool, chilly pond,
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you wear white jeans
'cause they don't absorb heat...
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that's actually science, I did research.
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You know, science aside, man, you working
those jeans. Oh, thanks for saying that, man.
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I was insecure
about the way they looked.
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You killing it, man.
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Hey, guys. How are you doing?
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Well, everything here looks normal.
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Welcome to The Ranch.
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I don't know what that means.
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Have a seat.
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REAGAN: Why would I do that?
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NICK: It'll cool you
right off. You'll love it.
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Ooh. Is that chair supposed to be wet?
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- It is.
- I...
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Okay.
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And away we... cool!
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(laughing): Check it out!
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Feels like somebody is learning
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to whistle very close to my face.
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That's right, it does.
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She said it feels like
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someone's whistling close to her face!
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I never thought of that.
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It's another plus.
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No.
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No, it's not.
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But I have a better idea.
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Why don't we all cool off...
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with the brand-new air
conditioner that I bought?
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- Son of a...
- Yes!
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- What?
- What?
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- A/C!
- Oh...
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- Damn.
- CECE: Oh, it was so hot.
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- Oh, yeah, this is wet.
- CECE: Having A/C.
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That's sweat from my bottom.
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SCHMIDT: This is amazing.
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Thank you, Reagan.
Finally, we can stop living
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like people in a beer commercial
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- before the beer shows up.
- How did you pull this off?
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It's not a big deal. That whole
riot thing's really overblown.
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- Get the hell back!
- (screams)
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I will be putting the A/C in my
room and everyone is welcome.
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No, thank you. We're good.
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I speak for all of us.
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REAGAN: Okay.
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Well, we are observing gym rules,
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so make sure you wipe down
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anything you plan to sit on.
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Whatever.
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More breeze for us.
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I'm gonna grab some old underpants
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and I'll put a pair
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in the freezer for each of you.
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Trust me, I'm wearing
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frozen underwear right now,
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- and I feel amazing.
- (crackling)
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So, I'm in good shape.
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- Cece?
- Mmm.
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I think maybe you should go...
go hang out by the A/C.
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Cece's got a big audition today
to be a reporter.
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She's been taking broadcasting classes.
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Any way you slice it,
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that cafeteria pizza is a great deal.
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You know, in fact,
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I'm getting a little hungry myself.
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How about you, Carl?
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I thought the next thing
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I was supposed to talk about
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was the rain.
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It is, Carl.
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I was just having a little banter.
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Oh.
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Um...
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I... uh, I had a sandwich
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so... I'm full.
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The audition's just for
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gas station TV, okay?
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Nobody watches it.
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WINSTON: Don't you dare downplay it.
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I adore gas station television,
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I mean, myself, personally.
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It is the intersection
between information
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and also gas.
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That's right. Cece, today it's gas,
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tomorrow, it's local news...
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the next thing you know,
you're reporting
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diabetes statistics
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as we all watch B-roll
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of fat people walking across the street.
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I just, I don't...
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I-I don't think
I'm gonna go to the audition.
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'Cause it's...
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it's just so hot.
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You know?
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Okay.
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Um...
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Yeah, I mean, that's-that's cool.
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Just... Look, I love you no matter what.
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Go cool off.
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- All right.
- All right.
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Can I talk to you for a second?
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What the hell was all that coddling?
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- Whoa.
- What are you, a big-bosomed grandma?
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Tough love! Make her go!
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Don't tell me what to do!
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I'm her fianc?,
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not some schnook off the street
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eating a peanut butter cookie.
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It's my job to give her
love and support.
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That's how I get her
to go to the audition.
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As a cop, do you think I would
get anyone to do anything
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if I were being kind and supportive?
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Hell no!
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Look, I have recently found my cop voice
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and I'll tell you this:
it is very effective.
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Is that what you've been
practicing in the bathroom?
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(loud): Everybody stop!
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Make a left turn!
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(high, wavering): You have the
right to remain silent! You...
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(elegant): Freeze! Nah.
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(over-enunciating): Three hundred
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and three thousand
thelonious thistles...
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(climbing vocal scale):
Handcuffs, handcuffs, handcuffs
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Handcuffs, handcuffs,
handcuffs, handcuffs.
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(deep): Freeze! (normal): Ooh, ooh.
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(? la Arnold Schwarzenegger): Down on the ground,
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fugitive of the law.
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Handcuffs, handcuffs,
handcuffs, handcuffs
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Handcuffs, handcuffs.
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Those were just my warmups.
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My point is this, man.
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You can't hug and kiss Cece
into doing anything.
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Your mind would melt if you knew
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what I've hugged
and kissed Cece into doing.
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Stay out of it, Winston.
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(chuckles): My guys.
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Hey, who needs Reagan's A/C, right?
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Here.
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Put some of my old underwear
on your face. It feels great.
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Oh, Nick...
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you're gonna make a great dad.
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I'll see you later.
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Okay.
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Hey! Who needs him, huh?
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Yeah. We got each other.
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- Yeah.
- We've been through worse.
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- Chicago!
- Chicago!
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(chuckles)
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City of soup, you know?
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Yes, sir.
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So I'm gonna go take a shower.
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I'll be back in a hot minute.
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Or, as we say on a day like today...
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- ...a minute.
- (laughs) That's great, man.
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That's chill, that's chill.
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That's great. Thanks for
taking my back today.
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- I'll see you in a sec.
- All right, all right.
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- You and me, all day. You and me.
- Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah.
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Look who it is! What happened?
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The A/C fall over
and squish Winston's cat?
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Oh, my God, please don't tell me
that happened. I would die.
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I just came out here to tell you
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that it's actually really nice in there.
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It's really nice right here,
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with my underpants on my face.
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I think maybe you should stop pouting
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because I didn't like whatever this is.
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Wait, what?
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Why would I care if you,
specifically, didn't like it?
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Nick.
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00:05:35,687 --> 00:05:37,388
Reagan.
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Nick, come on.
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You want to go there?
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I want to go where?
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What are you talking about?
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You wanted to impress me
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because you have a crush on me.
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(laughs)
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It's nice to get a good laugh
in this heat.
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(laughing)
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I need a laugh.
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It's too hot not to laugh.
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Lord knows it!
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00:06:01,613 --> 00:06:03,447
- You do.
- (laughing)
202
00:06:03,515 --> 00:06:05,783
I don't have a crush on you.
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You're very conceited.
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And I don't mean to burst
your bubble here, Missy,
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but I am not out here
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because of my "so-called crush on you,
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"based on my actions
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that led you to believe
I have a crush on you."
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I am out here
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because I have never been
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more comfortable in my entire life.
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Okay, you know what? Just go get!
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00:06:26,371 --> 00:06:28,305
Winston and I don't need you, sister.
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REAGAN: Oh, you mean
Winston, like, this Winston?
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00:06:29,841 --> 00:06:32,343
What do you mean, like this...
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00:06:34,512 --> 00:06:35,512
Oh, Winston.
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00:06:35,580 --> 00:06:37,681
I'm really sorry.
218
00:06:37,749 --> 00:06:39,617
It's fine, it's fine. Who needs you?
219
00:06:39,684 --> 00:06:41,285
'Cause the hottest part
of the day is already over.
220
00:06:41,353 --> 00:06:42,353
It's 9:30 in the morning.
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Then tell me this:
222
00:06:43,555 --> 00:06:44,855
why did I just eat lunch?
223
00:06:46,224 --> 00:06:48,405
Why did I just eat lunch?
224
00:06:48,945 --> 00:06:51,593
Mm, another guy just collapsed out there.
225
00:06:52,125 --> 00:06:55,812
Oh, but a good Samaritan to the rescue.
226
00:06:56,275 --> 00:06:59,244
(thudding) Oh, damn. Good
Samaritan just collapsed.
227
00:06:59,311 --> 00:07:01,012
Oh!
228
00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:04,482
And UPS guy to the rescue!
229
00:07:04,550 --> 00:07:07,252
(thudding)
And the UPS guy just collapsed.
230
00:07:07,319 --> 00:07:11,322
Ah, lady stealing packages...
231
00:07:11,390 --> 00:07:13,424
Ah...
232
00:07:13,492 --> 00:07:15,927
(thudding)
Oh! And the lady just collapsed.
233
00:07:15,995 --> 00:07:18,596
Whoo. You know, I'm actually
kind of getting chilly in here.
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00:07:18,664 --> 00:07:20,098
Look, guys.
235
00:07:20,165 --> 00:07:21,833
I got this box of Jess's
weird old ski clothes.
236
00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:23,434
- Oh!
- Ooh...
237
00:07:24,737 --> 00:07:25,937
Hello, 1989.
238
00:07:26,005 --> 00:07:27,005
WINSTON: Check me out,
239
00:07:27,072 --> 00:07:28,072
I'm Picabo Street.
240
00:07:28,140 --> 00:07:29,407
You know who that is, right?
241
00:07:29,475 --> 00:07:30,357
I don't know who that is.
242
00:07:30,424 --> 00:07:31,962
Real apr?s-ski vibe.
243
00:07:31,987 --> 00:07:33,309
I feel like I'm in Gstaad.
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00:07:33,377 --> 00:07:34,700
Gstaad's all about apr?s-ski.
245
00:07:34,768 --> 00:07:36,018
Well, it's nice in the summer, too.
246
00:07:36,143 --> 00:07:36,909
Oh, have you been?
247
00:07:36,977 --> 00:07:37,910
Have you?
248
00:07:37,978 --> 00:07:39,200
Have you?
249
00:07:39,268 --> 00:07:40,880
Have you been, is the real question.
250
00:07:40,948 --> 00:07:43,282
Have-have you been to Gstaad?
251
00:07:43,350 --> 00:07:44,550
Wh... I... - What does it
matter? Just tell the truth.
252
00:07:44,618 --> 00:07:45,657
Have you been there?
Have you been there?
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00:07:45,682 --> 00:07:47,486
- I'm sorry, have you?
- No, I haven't been there.
254
00:07:47,554 --> 00:07:49,221
- Well... (laughs)
- Should I be ashamed of that,
255
00:07:49,289 --> 00:07:50,656
or can we all just tell the truth
256
00:07:50,724 --> 00:07:52,491
about whether we've been to... "Shtaad."
257
00:07:52,559 --> 00:07:54,427
Please. It's "Gstaad."
258
00:07:54,494 --> 00:07:55,728
- Shaad.
- Shtaad.
259
00:07:55,796 --> 00:07:57,296
No one in this room has been to Gstaad.
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Yeah, one more fan.
261
00:07:59,132 --> 00:08:00,499
Just a little closer.
262
00:08:00,567 --> 00:08:02,301
Okay, that'll do it.
263
00:08:02,369 --> 00:08:04,136
You guys are suckers in
there! This is great!
264
00:08:04,204 --> 00:08:05,905
Should we be worried about him?
265
00:08:05,973 --> 00:08:07,907
Worried about Nick? Oh, no,
this is just what he does.
266
00:08:07,975 --> 00:08:09,742
Okay, but being exposed
to the heat for that long
267
00:08:09,810 --> 00:08:11,143
is actually super-dangerous,
268
00:08:11,211 --> 00:08:13,980
so... maybe I should go reason with him.
269
00:08:14,047 --> 00:08:15,114
(others laughing)
270
00:08:15,182 --> 00:08:17,083
"Reason."
271
00:08:17,150 --> 00:08:20,152
Please excuse our immediate
but correct response.
272
00:08:20,220 --> 00:08:21,821
(Nick grunts)
273
00:08:21,888 --> 00:08:23,055
(grunts)
274
00:08:23,123 --> 00:08:24,590
Oh, hey, hey.
275
00:08:24,658 --> 00:08:26,592
Please just come into my room?
It's right there.
276
00:08:26,660 --> 00:08:28,227
It's not even hot in reality.
277
00:08:28,295 --> 00:08:30,096
You're obviously suffering
from heat exhaustion.
278
00:08:30,163 --> 00:08:32,331
It's like a crisp Vermont November.
279
00:08:32,399 --> 00:08:34,567
Apple cider, football weather.
280
00:08:34,634 --> 00:08:36,202
Don't jump in a pile of leaves.
281
00:08:36,269 --> 00:08:38,137
(chuckling): There might be
a dead dog in there.
282
00:08:38,205 --> 00:08:39,343
You're slurring your speech.
283
00:08:39,411 --> 00:08:41,440
Soon you're gonna get dizzy,
you're gonna get cramps.
284
00:08:41,508 --> 00:08:43,179
Why do you care so much, Reagan?
285
00:08:43,247 --> 00:08:45,644
Because you look like
a dying man on a hospital show.
286
00:08:45,712 --> 00:08:48,381
Oh, I know why.
287
00:08:49,549 --> 00:08:51,384
Because you have a crush on me.
288
00:08:51,451 --> 00:08:53,819
- No.
- (laughs) Yeah.
289
00:08:53,887 --> 00:08:55,221
That's... that...
290
00:08:55,288 --> 00:08:56,956
I... You're... you're a human being
291
00:08:57,024 --> 00:08:59,558
- and I'm worried about...
- You have a crush on me.
292
00:08:59,626 --> 00:09:01,994
- No.
- That's why you're always thinking about me...
293
00:09:02,062 --> 00:09:03,329
That has nothing to do with that.
294
00:09:03,397 --> 00:09:04,730
...giving me my medicals,
295
00:09:04,798 --> 00:09:06,899
checking on me, giving me my medicals...
296
00:09:06,967 --> 00:09:08,801
You said that twice.
You are hallucinating.
297
00:09:08,869 --> 00:09:11,771
No, Reagan, I'm "ha-truth-inating."
298
00:09:11,838 --> 00:09:13,372
Okay, you know what, I'm
gonna have to smoke you out.
299
00:09:13,440 --> 00:09:14,940
Ooh-hoo! Smoke me out?
300
00:09:21,448 --> 00:09:23,282
Turn 'em all on, great.
301
00:09:23,350 --> 00:09:25,551
I love it hot.
302
00:09:28,455 --> 00:09:29,655
NICK: Great, turn 'em up.
303
00:09:29,723 --> 00:09:31,657
I got the sticks if you got the melons.
304
00:09:31,725 --> 00:09:32,958
Marsh-melons.
305
00:09:33,026 --> 00:09:34,460
Marshmallows.
306
00:09:34,528 --> 00:09:35,661
Sorry.
307
00:09:37,197 --> 00:09:38,397
308
00:09:38,465 --> 00:09:39,832
(imitates whooshing)
309
00:09:39,900 --> 00:09:41,567
(laughing): Hey, Deborah.
310
00:09:41,635 --> 00:09:44,203
- Hey, Cece, now that... now that we're...
- What?
311
00:09:44,271 --> 00:09:46,205
Now that we're in the cool,
have you rethought the audition?
312
00:09:46,273 --> 00:09:47,606
Maybe you'll go now?
313
00:09:47,674 --> 00:09:49,341
I mean, either way I love you, I just...
314
00:09:49,409 --> 00:09:51,177
- Um, no.
- No, okay.
315
00:09:51,244 --> 00:09:52,611
- Mm-mm.
- Okay, I still love you though.
316
00:09:54,581 --> 00:09:56,115
(whispering):
You leave me with no choice.
317
00:09:56,183 --> 00:09:57,183
(whispering): What are you doing?
318
00:09:57,250 --> 00:09:58,784
Ma'am! I'm gonna ask that you please
319
00:09:58,852 --> 00:10:01,787
- remove your headphones now!
- What?
320
00:10:01,855 --> 00:10:03,689
Do you know why I asked you
to remove your headphones?
321
00:10:03,757 --> 00:10:04,890
Why are you talking so loud?
322
00:10:04,958 --> 00:10:06,525
Do you have a cranberry
stuck in your ear again?
323
00:10:06,593 --> 00:10:08,394
- Winston found his cop voice.
- Oh...
324
00:10:08,462 --> 00:10:11,063
Ma'am! Why are you avoiding an audition
325
00:10:11,131 --> 00:10:12,965
when you know damn well
it's important to you?
326
00:10:13,033 --> 00:10:15,501
Don't do this. Get back in
your vehicle, immediately!
327
00:10:15,569 --> 00:10:17,436
Ma'am, please answer the question.
328
00:10:17,504 --> 00:10:19,171
Why are you avoiding an audition?
329
00:10:19,239 --> 00:10:22,174
And do not say that you are not,
because I know that you are,
330
00:10:22,242 --> 00:10:23,576
so tell me why!
331
00:10:25,036 --> 00:10:26,970
Why?! Why?!
332
00:10:27,872 --> 00:10:29,573
Why?!
333
00:10:29,642 --> 00:10:30,975
Now, damn it, speak!
334
00:10:31,043 --> 00:10:31,976
What if I'm not good enough?
335
00:10:32,044 --> 00:10:32,977
It's my dream job,
336
00:10:33,045 --> 00:10:34,078
and what if I can't do it, okay?
337
00:10:34,146 --> 00:10:35,980
What?
338
00:10:36,048 --> 00:10:37,582
Cece, you're the most talented...
339
00:10:37,650 --> 00:10:38,917
Sir, stand down!
340
00:10:38,984 --> 00:10:40,818
Winston, you stand down.
341
00:10:40,886 --> 00:10:42,654
Go play softball against
the fire department
342
00:10:42,721 --> 00:10:45,256
- or whatever it is you do.
- That's not till Wednesday.
343
00:10:45,324 --> 00:10:46,491
- Honey, I was terrified.
- Don't worry... don't...
344
00:10:46,558 --> 00:10:47,825
My hands are shaking. Block that out.
345
00:10:47,893 --> 00:10:49,494
- I'm freaking out. Yeah.
- Block that out.
346
00:10:49,561 --> 00:10:50,628
SCHMIDT: Okay, let's plan a trip.
347
00:10:50,696 --> 00:10:51,663
Something to look forward to.
348
00:10:51,730 --> 00:10:52,664
Yeah, that'd be great.
349
00:10:52,731 --> 00:10:53,665
Mother freckles.
350
00:10:53,732 --> 00:10:56,701
Winston's wild.
351
00:10:56,769 --> 00:10:57,936
CECE: God, that was so scary.
352
00:10:58,003 --> 00:11:00,605
It was so terrible.
353
00:11:00,673 --> 00:11:01,606
It's okay.
354
00:11:02,675 --> 00:11:04,609
(grunting)
355
00:11:06,845 --> 00:11:08,579
Can you just admit
that it's hot in here?
356
00:11:08,647 --> 00:11:11,282
There's no way that you
are not hot. I'm hot.
357
00:11:11,350 --> 00:11:13,251
Why are you so worried
about old Nicky pots and pans?
358
00:11:13,319 --> 00:11:14,752
I don't have a crush on you.
359
00:11:14,820 --> 00:11:16,120
You have a crush on me, it's obvious.
360
00:11:16,188 --> 00:11:17,956
Why would I have a crush on you?
361
00:11:18,023 --> 00:11:20,425
You are the most stubborn,
annoying, frustrating person
362
00:11:20,492 --> 00:11:22,126
I have ever met in my entire life.
363
00:11:22,194 --> 00:11:24,128
Why don't you tell that
to the judge in your pants?
364
00:11:24,196 --> 00:11:25,697
Verdict's in. You're guilty.
365
00:11:27,032 --> 00:11:28,633
Where are you going?!
366
00:11:28,701 --> 00:11:30,034
I'm shutting down your ranch.
367
00:11:30,102 --> 00:11:33,304
Leave my ranch out of it!
368
00:11:33,372 --> 00:11:36,040
Well, then I'm gonna do this, you idiot.
369
00:11:36,108 --> 00:11:37,342
Whoa.
370
00:11:37,409 --> 00:11:38,476
No, don't.
371
00:11:38,544 --> 00:11:39,978
- Leave it alone.
- REAGAN: Stop.
372
00:11:40,913 --> 00:11:43,181
REAGAN: No, you don't...
373
00:11:43,248 --> 00:11:45,483
(beeping) (beeping)
374
00:11:45,551 --> 00:11:46,818
- What is going on?!
- Damn! Damn!
375
00:11:46,885 --> 00:11:48,186
Reagan, please, let...
376
00:11:59,331 --> 00:12:01,766
- Look, she's the one...
- Wh... No, you're the one.
377
00:12:01,834 --> 00:12:03,668
SCHMIDT: Now, get down to the
basement and fix our power.
378
00:12:03,736 --> 00:12:05,470
But the basement?
There are so many rats.
379
00:12:05,537 --> 00:12:07,138
She'll probably try to make out with me.
380
00:12:07,206 --> 00:12:08,473
Please, I would rather
make out with a rat.
381
00:12:08,540 --> 00:12:09,640
Gross. Did you hear what she just said?
382
00:12:09,708 --> 00:12:11,342
Stop! Go to the basement
383
00:12:11,410 --> 00:12:14,112
- and stay there until the power is fixed!
- Yes, sir.
384
00:12:14,179 --> 00:12:16,214
(bell dinging)
385
00:12:17,783 --> 00:12:19,717
Now, I have accidentally
pressed all of the buttons,
386
00:12:19,785 --> 00:12:21,552
but you will stay on the elevator
387
00:12:21,620 --> 00:12:23,521
until you get to the basement!
388
00:12:23,589 --> 00:12:27,237
And when you get to
that basement... Aw, damn...
389
00:12:27,659 --> 00:12:30,115
How is it even hotter down here
390
00:12:30,302 --> 00:12:32,271
Because the heat stays low, you dummy.
391
00:12:32,356 --> 00:12:33,690
It's bad enough that we're down here,
392
00:12:33,758 --> 00:12:35,025
I can't explain science to you.
393
00:12:35,093 --> 00:12:36,493
I hope that the Chicago Cubs
394
00:12:36,561 --> 00:12:38,495
win the World Series
while you're in a coma.
395
00:12:38,563 --> 00:12:41,865
That's one of the meanest things
anybody has ever said to me.
396
00:12:41,933 --> 00:12:44,101
We are visitors, let's act like it.
397
00:12:47,138 --> 00:12:49,506
Hello, rats?
398
00:12:49,574 --> 00:12:51,675
Hello?! (grunts)
399
00:12:51,742 --> 00:12:53,677
I come to hurt ya.
400
00:12:55,746 --> 00:12:58,982
Okay, for those who
have not been scared off,
401
00:12:59,050 --> 00:13:00,984
I actually come in peace.
402
00:13:01,052 --> 00:13:02,513
My name is Nick.
403
00:13:02,581 --> 00:13:05,155
- I've been down here a lot.
- (high-pitched): Hello, Nicholas.
404
00:13:05,223 --> 00:13:06,523
I'm Jeremiah.
405
00:13:06,591 --> 00:13:07,991
- Sorry.
- Why would you...?
406
00:13:08,059 --> 00:13:10,694
- It's funny.
- Very clever.
407
00:13:10,761 --> 00:13:11,695
You got really scared.
408
00:13:11,762 --> 00:13:13,163
I'm not so scared,
409
00:13:13,231 --> 00:13:14,664
but don't ever do that again.
410
00:13:14,732 --> 00:13:16,833
It's also a very good rat voice.
411
00:13:16,901 --> 00:13:18,735
- Thank you.
- But it is a terrible rat name.
412
00:13:18,803 --> 00:13:21,538
Jeremiah? That would never
be the name of a rat.
413
00:13:21,606 --> 00:13:23,540
It's name is, like, Sushi.
414
00:13:23,608 --> 00:13:24,841
Or "Ma-cushi."
415
00:13:25,776 --> 00:13:27,177
Now, follow me.
416
00:13:27,245 --> 00:13:30,013
I want to leave one set of footprints.
417
00:13:30,081 --> 00:13:32,349
That is a perfect plan,
but I'm not going to do that.
418
00:13:32,416 --> 00:13:34,351
419
00:13:37,655 --> 00:13:39,589
Oh, hello, old friend.
420
00:13:39,657 --> 00:13:41,725
Funny seeing you here.
421
00:13:42,793 --> 00:13:44,127
Tick-tock.
422
00:13:44,195 --> 00:13:45,629
Almost audition time.
423
00:13:46,797 --> 00:13:48,131
- Hey, Cece.
- Huh?
424
00:13:48,199 --> 00:13:49,966
You know that thing you said before
425
00:13:50,034 --> 00:13:51,968
about you not being talented enough?
426
00:13:52,036 --> 00:13:53,403
You didn't mean that, right?
427
00:13:53,471 --> 00:13:54,804
(laughing): Yeah, I did.
428
00:13:54,872 --> 00:13:56,406
Newscasters are amazing.
429
00:13:56,474 --> 00:13:57,340
But so are you.
430
00:13:57,408 --> 00:13:59,342
Come on, Schmidt, okay?
431
00:13:59,410 --> 00:14:01,178
I'm a bartender and a model.
432
00:14:07,151 --> 00:14:09,052
(Southern accent): Ma'am, I'm gonna
need you to step out of the vehicle.
433
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:11,555
- (quietly): Yes, do it, baby.
- "Vehicle"? What vehicle?
434
00:14:11,622 --> 00:14:13,423
The metaphorical vehicle
that is holding you back.
435
00:14:13,491 --> 00:14:15,458
- Oh.
- Don't explain yourself. Just go with it.
436
00:14:15,526 --> 00:14:17,961
You are a brilliant, amazing woman,
437
00:14:18,029 --> 00:14:20,730
- who is capable of anything.
- Okay, maybe drop the Southern accent.
438
00:14:20,798 --> 00:14:22,766
(New York accent): What, you
got mozzarell in your ears?
439
00:14:22,833 --> 00:14:24,968
You're, uh, get out
of your own way, lady, huh?
440
00:14:25,036 --> 00:14:27,070
Uh, tr-try, Law and Order... uh, Hargitay.
441
00:14:27,138 --> 00:14:29,439
I've got a past and it affects my job.
442
00:14:29,507 --> 00:14:31,543
And my relationships...
I can't really do a Mariska.
443
00:14:31,611 --> 00:14:32,696
What is happening here?
444
00:14:32,721 --> 00:14:34,768
Cece, I know the audition
is scary for you.
445
00:14:34,812 --> 00:14:38,281
I would not be doing my job
as the man who loves you
446
00:14:38,349 --> 00:14:40,016
if I let you walk away from this.
447
00:14:40,084 --> 00:14:42,352
Don't blow it, Cece!
448
00:14:42,420 --> 00:14:45,188
You are not walking away
from this opportunity!
449
00:14:47,091 --> 00:14:49,025
- Okay...
- I'm gonna need less talking out of you
450
00:14:49,093 --> 00:14:50,660
and more action, damn it!
451
00:14:53,030 --> 00:14:54,965
(quietly): Wow.
452
00:14:57,335 --> 00:14:59,102
Wait, no, Cece, I'm sorry.
453
00:14:59,170 --> 00:15:00,570
- Did I take it too far?
- (door opens)
454
00:15:00,638 --> 00:15:02,939
I took it too far, didn't I? Oh, God.
455
00:15:03,007 --> 00:15:04,140
It's fine.
456
00:15:04,208 --> 00:15:06,610
I have been down this road many a-times.
457
00:15:06,677 --> 00:15:09,246
She's gonna come walking
back through that door
458
00:15:09,313 --> 00:15:11,281
in three, two...
459
00:15:11,349 --> 00:15:13,316
(chuckles)
460
00:15:18,022 --> 00:15:20,857
Look, Schmidt, not for nothing,
461
00:15:20,925 --> 00:15:24,494
man, you got so many good
characters inside of you.
462
00:15:24,554 --> 00:15:27,378
(chuckles): Oh, my gosh.
463
00:15:27,454 --> 00:15:30,133
- Did you already bind the 120s?
- Yeah, this should do it.
464
00:15:30,201 --> 00:15:32,969
Do what? (scoffs)
Cook you like barbecue chicken?
465
00:15:33,037 --> 00:15:35,305
- I traced it back. It's fine.
- I wouldn't do that if I were you.
466
00:15:35,373 --> 00:15:37,307
- It's not safe.
- Can you admit that I might actually
467
00:15:37,375 --> 00:15:38,541
be right about something for once?
468
00:15:38,609 --> 00:15:39,842
- It's your own funeral; you win.
- Great.
469
00:15:39,910 --> 00:15:40,979
- Don't do it!
- Nick!
470
00:15:41,004 --> 00:15:42,317
Fine, let's just say you are right.
471
00:15:42,372 --> 00:15:44,426
Then at least let me do it, okay?
472
00:15:45,426 --> 00:15:46,858
You don't have to do that.
473
00:15:46,926 --> 00:15:48,254
I want to do it.
474
00:15:49,356 --> 00:15:52,514
I mean, I don't, like, want
to do it, obviously, but...
475
00:15:52,582 --> 00:15:54,524
(stammers) What if I'm wrong?
476
00:15:54,591 --> 00:15:57,422
If you think this is right,
it's probably right.
477
00:15:57,490 --> 00:15:59,601
You've been, you've been right
about a lot of stuff today.
478
00:15:59,669 --> 00:16:01,886
Like what? What else was I right about?
479
00:16:01,953 --> 00:16:02,791
Just a lot of stuff. I don't
want to talk about what
480
00:16:02,859 --> 00:16:05,328
you were actually right about
at this moment. Okay, ready?
481
00:16:05,499 --> 00:16:07,748
- Uh...
- If I get burned up
482
00:16:07,773 --> 00:16:08,810
and die this way, it would be
483
00:16:08,835 --> 00:16:10,140
such an embarrassing way to go.
484
00:16:10,429 --> 00:16:12,065
But what would be nice about it is
485
00:16:12,132 --> 00:16:13,364
that I would technically
have been right.
486
00:16:13,432 --> 00:16:15,032
Here we go.
487
00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:16,667
Heroes don't wear capes.
488
00:16:16,735 --> 00:16:18,502
No, no, no...
489
00:16:18,570 --> 00:16:20,504
(whirring)
490
00:16:22,107 --> 00:16:24,108
Those sons of bitches did it.
491
00:16:24,176 --> 00:16:26,544
(chuckling)
492
00:16:26,611 --> 00:16:28,212
Hey, great!
493
00:16:28,280 --> 00:16:30,948
Really good.
494
00:16:31,016 --> 00:16:32,950
That was really great.
495
00:16:40,125 --> 00:16:41,926
(whispers): What are you looking at?
496
00:16:41,993 --> 00:16:43,728
Huge... rat.
497
00:16:51,022 --> 00:16:53,938
- (squeaking)
- (screaming)
498
00:16:54,005 --> 00:16:55,806
(screaming) No! No! No!
499
00:16:55,874 --> 00:16:57,708
This is my nightmare!
500
00:17:02,114 --> 00:17:04,715
(people shouting indistinctly)
501
00:17:04,783 --> 00:17:07,551
It's time.
502
00:17:12,405 --> 00:17:14,706
(grunting)
503
00:17:14,774 --> 00:17:16,341
How did I...?
504
00:17:16,409 --> 00:17:18,510
Did you carry me out like a firefighter?
505
00:17:18,577 --> 00:17:20,378
No, you woke up right away.
506
00:17:20,446 --> 00:17:21,846
And then you were like,
"Ooh, I need some fresh air."
507
00:17:21,914 --> 00:17:23,481
So we came outside,
I bought you a muffin
508
00:17:23,549 --> 00:17:24,716
and then you passed out again.
509
00:17:24,784 --> 00:17:26,718
Oh, yeah, I remember that muffin.
510
00:17:26,786 --> 00:17:28,186
I feel like you had a pretty bad shock,
511
00:17:28,254 --> 00:17:30,488
so let's ask a few questions.
512
00:17:30,556 --> 00:17:32,424
What day of the week is it?
513
00:17:32,491 --> 00:17:34,592
That's not something I typically know.
514
00:17:34,660 --> 00:17:36,728
I would guess Monday.
515
00:17:36,796 --> 00:17:37,896
Okay.
516
00:17:37,964 --> 00:17:39,264
Blackout.
517
00:17:39,332 --> 00:17:40,899
ATM's are down.
518
00:17:40,967 --> 00:17:42,767
Cash is king
519
00:17:42,835 --> 00:17:44,836
and batteries is queen.
520
00:17:44,904 --> 00:17:47,439
What? Stop being so whimsical, Winston.
521
00:17:49,008 --> 00:17:50,942
Cece still hasn't called me back.
522
00:17:51,010 --> 00:17:52,410
(sighs)
523
00:17:52,478 --> 00:17:53,945
I think I pushed her too far.
524
00:17:54,013 --> 00:17:56,448
No, Schmidt,
you did the right thing, man.
525
00:17:56,515 --> 00:17:58,016
Look, people get mad at police officers
526
00:17:58,084 --> 00:18:00,418
because we tell them
what they don't want to hear.
527
00:18:00,486 --> 00:18:02,220
Yet, everyone loves
528
00:18:02,288 --> 00:18:04,055
- police officer...
- (horns honking)
529
00:18:04,123 --> 00:18:05,757
(deep voice): Hey, it's a blackout,
530
00:18:05,825 --> 00:18:06,858
not the Rapture!
531
00:18:06,926 --> 00:18:07,859
You yield!
532
00:18:07,927 --> 00:18:09,094
All right!
533
00:18:09,161 --> 00:18:10,695
- (people shouting)
- Hey, hey, hey, sir, sir!
534
00:18:10,763 --> 00:18:12,965
Keep it moving! Keep it moving!
Keep it moving!
535
00:18:13,033 --> 00:18:14,032
Come on, right this way, ma'am.
536
00:18:14,100 --> 00:18:16,001
Right this way, ma'am.
Right this way, ma'am.
537
00:18:16,068 --> 00:18:18,169
Right that way, ma'am. Sir, go, go, go!
538
00:18:18,237 --> 00:18:19,204
We ain't got all day!
539
00:18:19,271 --> 00:18:20,572
WINSTON: Sir!
540
00:18:20,639 --> 00:18:21,370
Cece.
541
00:18:21,395 --> 00:18:22,944
- Right this way, ma'am. Right that way, ma'am.
542
00:18:22,987 --> 00:18:24,075
Thank God you're here.
543
00:18:24,143 --> 00:18:26,211
Look... I'm-I'm sorry.
544
00:18:26,278 --> 00:18:27,779
Yeah, well, you should be.
You really pissed me off.
545
00:18:27,847 --> 00:18:30,281
I wrote something rude on your car.
546
00:18:30,349 --> 00:18:31,716
It was that stupid cop voice.
547
00:18:31,784 --> 00:18:32,917
I shouldn't have pushed you that hard.
548
00:18:32,985 --> 00:18:34,219
No, you should've.
549
00:18:34,286 --> 00:18:35,820
'Cause you were right.
550
00:18:35,888 --> 00:18:38,556
I was chickening out.
551
00:18:38,624 --> 00:18:40,892
- So I went.
- You did?
552
00:18:40,960 --> 00:18:42,594
- Mm-hmm.
- Well, that's amazing. How did it go?
553
00:18:42,661 --> 00:18:44,329
- Real bad. Yeah.
- It went real bad?
554
00:18:44,397 --> 00:18:45,997
Okay, well, you know what?
about it, baby, I'm sure...
555
00:18:46,065 --> 00:18:47,999
No, no, no, no. They just didn't...
556
00:18:48,067 --> 00:18:49,634
It was, it was legitimately terrible
557
00:18:49,702 --> 00:18:53,438
but not because I'm not talented.
558
00:18:53,506 --> 00:18:55,273
I went to the bar first
559
00:18:55,341 --> 00:18:58,004
so I was wasted and wearing shorts,
560
00:18:58,072 --> 00:18:59,878
which I won't do next time.
561
00:18:59,945 --> 00:19:01,246
(both laugh)
562
00:19:01,313 --> 00:19:02,847
Thank you for pushing me.
563
00:19:02,915 --> 00:19:04,215
We need to do that
kind of thing for each other.
564
00:19:04,283 --> 00:19:05,884
Yes, please.
565
00:19:05,951 --> 00:19:07,886
I agree, unless,
566
00:19:07,953 --> 00:19:10,088
of course, it's about me using
face wash all over my body.
567
00:19:10,156 --> 00:19:12,957
- Ah, this again, really?
- I don't care that it's expensive.
568
00:19:13,025 --> 00:19:15,660
- I know that you don't care.
- I'm just gonna keep on doing it.
569
00:19:15,728 --> 00:19:17,629
- (music playing)
- Oh, ice cream truck! Oh!
570
00:19:17,696 --> 00:19:18,897
Right this way!
571
00:19:18,964 --> 00:19:20,265
Here we go, sir. Here we go, sir.
572
00:19:20,332 --> 00:19:21,933
Here we go, sir. All right, stop!
573
00:19:22,001 --> 00:19:24,769
(music playing)
574
00:19:24,837 --> 00:19:26,671
Ice cream, man, open up.
575
00:19:26,739 --> 00:19:28,440
Where the ice cream at?
576
00:19:28,507 --> 00:19:30,475
Can I buy you some ice cream?
577
00:19:30,543 --> 00:19:32,911
First, uh, I just want
to revisit that little moment
578
00:19:32,978 --> 00:19:34,312
in the basement where you were like,
579
00:19:34,380 --> 00:19:36,614
"Hey, Reagan, you've been right
about a lot of stuff today."
580
00:19:36,682 --> 00:19:37,730
Really?
581
00:19:37,755 --> 00:19:39,141
I just want you to
specifically tell me what
582
00:19:39,185 --> 00:19:40,718
- You are out of control.
- I've been right about.
583
00:19:40,786 --> 00:19:42,554
You're a grown man.
I just think you should be
584
00:19:42,621 --> 00:19:43,988
- able to say it.
- (laughs) You dick.
585
00:19:47,293 --> 00:19:49,060
I have a crush on you.
586
00:19:49,128 --> 00:19:50,462
Hmm.
587
00:19:50,529 --> 00:19:51,796
There it is.
588
00:19:51,864 --> 00:19:52,864
I have a crush on you.
589
00:19:52,932 --> 00:19:54,065
Isn't that better?
590
00:19:54,133 --> 00:19:55,633
Now we can just put it behind us,
591
00:19:55,701 --> 00:19:58,403
move on, don't have to be weird.
592
00:19:58,471 --> 00:20:01,072
No, I, obviously, I-I know it's
not gonna be a problem, Reagan.
593
00:20:01,140 --> 00:20:02,674
I don't have any illusion
594
00:20:02,741 --> 00:20:04,375
that you're gonna go for a guy like me.
595
00:20:04,443 --> 00:20:06,077
I am a total mess. I understand that.
596
00:20:06,145 --> 00:20:08,513
I mean, you're-you're beautiful,
597
00:20:08,581 --> 00:20:09,914
and-and you're smart,
598
00:20:09,982 --> 00:20:12,250
and you're-you're mean,
599
00:20:12,318 --> 00:20:13,785
but in a hot way.
600
00:20:13,853 --> 00:20:16,521
And-and you have the-the
mind of a electrician,
601
00:20:16,589 --> 00:20:19,724
which is so confusingly hot,
because that is not, like,
602
00:20:19,792 --> 00:20:20,925
a sexy...
603
00:20:22,261 --> 00:20:24,429
We could both be stars
604
00:20:24,497 --> 00:20:26,131
Yeah, who knows?
605
00:20:26,198 --> 00:20:28,233
We could fall apart
606
00:20:28,300 --> 00:20:30,301
Yeah, who knows?
607
00:20:32,138 --> 00:20:34,572
Who knows?
608
00:20:35,674 --> 00:20:38,109
609
00:20:38,177 --> 00:20:39,944
All the things that we wanna be
610
00:20:40,012 --> 00:20:41,980
Excuse me, is your name Stephanie?
611
00:20:42,047 --> 00:20:44,449
I'm supposed to be
meeting somebody here.
612
00:20:46,318 --> 00:20:48,520
It's Nick.
613
00:20:48,587 --> 00:20:51,689
So, no Stephanie.
614
00:20:51,757 --> 00:20:54,259
Hey, yo, Nick, you coming, man?
615
00:20:54,326 --> 00:20:56,594
All that we do is, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
616
00:20:56,662 --> 00:20:57,929
Great.
617
00:20:57,997 --> 00:20:59,464
Follow the world as it goes...
618
00:20:59,532 --> 00:21:01,432
What is this, a frozen banana, Winston?
619
00:21:01,500 --> 00:21:03,301
Okay.
620
00:21:03,369 --> 00:21:04,769
While you're gassing up,
621
00:21:04,837 --> 00:21:07,739
let's look at the stock merkins.
622
00:21:07,806 --> 00:21:09,641
Marts... Nope!
623
00:21:09,708 --> 00:21:11,576
Is this... is this here?
624
00:21:11,644 --> 00:21:13,878
Or is it more here? Your frame?
625
00:21:13,946 --> 00:21:15,747
Because I don't want to just be like,
626
00:21:15,814 --> 00:21:17,982
you know, a head that's like...
627
00:21:18,050 --> 00:21:19,984
Scientists have discovered
628
00:21:20,052 --> 00:21:22,820
a new kind of butter.
629
00:21:22,888 --> 00:21:25,456
Fly in the Amazon.
630
00:21:25,524 --> 00:21:27,292
What the crap does that mean?
631
00:21:27,359 --> 00:21:29,294
I'm so sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry.
632
00:21:29,361 --> 00:21:30,862
You don't...
633
00:21:30,930 --> 00:21:33,865
Is this...? I don't know
who I borrowed this from.
634
00:21:33,933 --> 00:21:36,514
Synced and corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com
635
00:21:36,564 --> 00:21:41,114
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